I continue to visit my centenarian Auntie E, but these visits don’t really generate marketing-relevant content, so they aren’t reported here. Here’s the history of my past off-topic indulgences:
| Post Date | Title | Auntie’s Age |
|---|---|---|
| Jun 6, 2010 | THE GRACIOUSNESS OF ‘NO’ | 92 |
| Sep 20, 2012 | WEEKEND WITH AUNTIE E | 94 |
| Jun 1, 2018 | AUNTIE E’S BIG BREAK | 100 |
Auntie E is now 102, and since her ‘big break’ two years ago, she has been living on her own at the family farm. I can’t imagine she will be around much longer, so please indulge me one more time, acknowledging the Auntie E knows almost nothing about marketing. Our conversation went something like this:
“Thank you for visiting, Dear. I’d like us to chat on the front porch bench swing. Your great-grandfather used to call it the Confessional Couch.”
“Auntie, it’s late January. Everything is covered in snow out there.”
“Oh my—you’ve become such a city boy. We will bundle up properly, but you will want to put your hand phone down while we’re out there.”
And after some fussing…
“va-va-va-va-va…”
“You were right about the temperature. If I were a witch, I’d need a thermal brassiere.”
“Was great-grandfather C-c-c-catholic?”
“It’s just one of his sayings, Dear. I was reading up on your marketing business using one of those hyper-connection thingies you sent me and I have a few questions. That world-web is a real rabbit warren, I must say. Anyway, I find it curious that your industry, which clearly prides itself on being contemporary, socially-savvy and creatively-minded, seems to have more diversity and sexual harassment problems than many others.”
“Auntie, if you got that impression, it must be because we’re being more honest about it and more willing to talk about it.”
“Seems like your industry is much better at talking about the right thing than you are at doing the right thing. You need more country thinking—lead by good deeds and good words, not by deceit and hyperbole. Current President of the United States excepted. That’s how you lead your industry and your customers.”
“If this was a Confession, shouldn’t one of us be confessing something?”
“If this was a Confession, we would be missing the penitent. Clearly, there’s more work to do here.”
“Are you f-f-f-feeling okay, Auntie?
“Well, it’s too cold out here for the vapours, so…”
“Auntie, are you vaping?
“No, I’m breathing. Maybe we should go inside.”
What a kooky ol’ gal she is.
- Main image credit: Joon Han.
