There is no escaping modern communication technology. In business, you must use email, a smart phone and some sort of online meeting program. These tools certainly can be more directly cost-efficient than conversing and meeting the old-fashioned (human) way. But unless they are used with some balance, the the hidden cost can be fatal.

Voice mail, email and now mobile texting are powerful communication control mechanisms. I believe it’s this control that makes them so appealing and so addictive. You can control when you deal with requests—those coming from you and those coming to you. But the point is that it’s all on your schedule, not the other party’s. It seems like two-way communication with a bit of a time delay, but it’s really one-way communication, devoid of tonality and human context. Somehow, smiley icons and semi-colon winkies just don’t cut it in business communications or when you get past your teen years. At least half of human communication is tonality and context, especially at the ends of the emotional spectrum. We humans tend to fill in own assumptions on the missing tonality of a conversation, and it’s easy to be categorically wrong when doing so.

The hidden cost of all this wonderful technology is huge: it can cost you the human relationship. Not instantly, but slowly and insidiously. So how can we avoid that?

  1. Remember what email & texting is good for: stating facts & details, providing easy links to background information and the previous conversation thread. Covering your ass. Remember what email & texting isn’t good for: Anything sensitive. Collaboration that requires lots of short back & forth conversation. Inspiring with personality.
  2. No matter what, talk by phone with your key customers & clients at least once a week, as long as it is for a real reason. Meet with them at least monthly.
  3. Alternate between online meetings/teleconferences and face-to-face meetings. For the latter, just make sure you respect the other party’s time.
  4. Every once in a while, write a nice note, with a pen on real writing paper or note card. You can still write, can’t you?